Saying Goodbye to Sydney

Today we said goodbye to our beloved dog, Sydney.  She was just over 14 years old and the sweetest, most loyal dog anyone could ever ask for.  Over the past month her health had continued to decline and she started having multiple seizures a day that caused her to collapse.  She'd stopped eating her food a few weeks ago and was growing weaker and more arthritic every day.  After consulting with our vet last week, we made the decision that her quality of life was not as it should be.  We felt that we owed it to her to give her the peace and dignity she deserved at the end of her very awesome life.  It was the most difficult decision I have ever had to make and although I know it was the right thing to do, I still feel absolutely crushed.

I knew saying goodbye would be hard on all of us, but I thought because I had known this day was coming that it would make it a little easier.  It didn't.  Also, we had been talking to Handley about Sydney going to live in Dog Heaven soon and the fact that she would not be with us forever.  I thought that would help her cope a little more when the time came.  It didn't.  When I told her this morning she started sobbing.  All day long she would look at Sydney and start crying.  Tonight I went in to check on her after she went to bed and she was crying.  She just keeps saying she misses Sydney.  She's asked a lot of questions trying to make sense of everything and has a lot to say about our sweet old girl.

• Who will take Sydney on walks and play with her?
• Where will she go potty in Heaven?
• Now who will I be able to take on walks and play with? 
• I don't want another dog, I just want Sydney to be our dog.
• Can she live for just 2 more days?
• Who decided it was time for her to go to Heaven?
• What do you think she is doing there right now? 
• How did she get there?
• Who is she going to live with? 
• What are we going to do with all of the treats and dog food we have left?
• She's never going to come back to our house again and I'm just going to miss her too much. 

Our vet let us borrow a children's book called, Dog Heaven, by Cynthia Rylant.  We read it together several times tonight and I think it helped with some of her questioning, but still doesn't make it any easier on her.  

Robby and I adopted Sydney from another family just after we got married.  She was 7 years old then and we were hesitant to get an older dog, but it turned out to be the best decision.  Before we had kids, Sydney went EVERYWHERE with us.  She rode on the boat, swam in our pool in Florida, slept in our bed and rode in the car when we ran errands.  When we first moved to Florida and Robby was working a bunch she was my saving grace.  Before I had met any friends there she and I would hang out constantly and she was my walking buddy.  

When Handley was born, she took it in stride as if she knew her changing role.  Sydney NEVER left Handley's side.  Where ever Handley was, Sydney could be found a few feet away.  She was Handley's first friend and taught her to love dogs.  We could not have asked for a better dog for our family.  Sydney was SO wonderful with kids and would tolerate anything from being climbed on to having her tail pulled.  I still remember the first time Handley laughed as a baby was when she was watching Sydney play with a toy.

After Harper was born, the amount of time and attention we were able to give Sydney lessened, but our love for her never changed.  Harper also learned to love dogs and Sydney loved having someone else to drop food down for her.  Up until today, Harper was still the one that would sneak to the pantry to get treats for Sydney.

I'm very sad that Hudson is just getting to the age that he would have taken notice to Sydney and that he won't get a chance to really know her.

What I do know for sure is that we will never forget Syndey and all of the wonderful memories we had with her.  A few things we'll always remember: 

She smiled at people when she was excited, could balance a treat on her nose and then flip it into the air before catching it with her mouth, LOVED to swim and would do it any chance she got, liked chewing on pine cones and sticks, and loved each and every one of us just as we loved her.  

I wanted one picture of all three kids with Sydney because I had none of her with Hudson.  Last night I helped her get outside to lay with us while the kids played after dinner.  Seeing her laying there and how the happiness from her eyes had faded away, I knew we were making the best decision, even if it was the most difficult one.  

We will miss you Sydney.  Thank you for being the BEST dog our family could have ever asked for.